Sunday, April 20, 2008

50 Reasons Why Morgan & Xtina Didn’t Go On Any Dates This Semester:

I believe the title says enough, we have managed to compile a list of 50 reasons why no guys asked us out -or even wanted to ask us out this semester, I'm sure we could have made this list even longer

50. When a boy asks us what our plans are, we say that we are "obviously hanging out with each other."
49. Have photo shoots on a weekly basis—most of the time. Being models is such a busy life...
48. Get all of the latest model poses—which we implement in our weekly photo shoots—by watching America's Next Top Model marathons on VH1
47. Share an addiction for What Not to Wear, even though we never got to watch one together this semester
46. As a tradition, we binge on Churros (at least three) everytime we are at Disneyland, even when we are not with eachother
45. Have matching MacBooks
44. "Pimped out" our rides, aka MacBooks, using the exact same method, just different foiling colors (Kristina has green and Morgan has red)
43. Wear way too much cheetah and or/leopard print
42. Half the time, our hanging out is spent studying in the library together
41. The most common text message we send each other is, "Where are you?"
40. We talk to each other on our computers via google chat even though we're in the same room.
39. Watched all of Grey's Anatomy—4 seasons worth—in our apartment within two months.
38. Love to fill up people's cameras with pictures of the two of us (usually taken in a "MySpace fashion" from a high angle)
37. Make friends with random people on campus: Spanish-speaking missionaries, Multimedia Lab Assistants, etc.
36. Invite those friends over for game nights (excluding the missionaries) and then use them to get us Oregon Trail for our computers.
35. Whenever we go to a concert, we somehow manage to get in the VIP area where we then proceed to steal energy drinks by shoving them into our giant handbags.
34. Carry around handbags filled with stolen energy drinks.
33. We're beautiful, ambitious, and are pursuing careers as high powered doctors: traits that, when combined, are lethal and imtimidating to other men. Specifically—all of BYU men.
32. Judge people by their ability to put makeup on—basically how much black eyeliner they apply.
31. MAC Cosmetics addicts
30. Know all the MAC eyeshadow colors by heart. So instead of saying, "Oh your makeup looks good today," we say, "Oh I really like Amber Lights on your lid. And is that a hint of Honey Lust I see on your lid?"
29. We relate to over 50% of the things on the list of "Stuff White People Like"
28. Criticize the blonde, white waitresses at sushi restaurants. Blonde/white= not legit.
27. It has been said that we even talk in the same manner/way.
26. When people ask us about doing things separately we reply,"Whatever, we do what we want!"
25. After we saw a Gay couple at Disneyland, we choose to hold hands as well.
24. Whenever there is a Cheesecake Factory in the area near us, we proceed to go and enjoy a tasty slice of key-lime cheesecake—even if we are full.
23. Refer to each other by somewhat offensive terms such as hoe, skank, and slut.
22. Sometimes refer to each other by our Grey's Anatomy Aliases—Dr. Torres and Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery-Shepherd
21. In discussing our lives, we also burst into random rap or hip-hop songs, i.e. "I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T do you know what that means?"
20. Call people Cholos (mostly Xtina). Example: "What do you think you are looking at, Cholo?"
19. Relate our lives to surgeries and relationships within the Grey's Anatomy universe.
18. Make our own Spring Break DISNEYLAND.
17. Make fun of the lame Jack Sparrow impersonator at Disneyland.
16. Facebook stalk people (mostly Morgan).
15. Try to order Asparagus on our pizza (actually, that was just Morgan again).
14. Cruise the streets of Provo in a flashy red Mustang
13. Dance ridiculously while driving in the flashy red Mustang
12. Compiled a complete playlist of all 326 songs played on Grey's Anatomy
11. Enjoy Sub-Zero fixes weekly
10. We Cackle, as opposed to flirtatiously giggling when speaking to boys/men
9. Listen to Britney Spears, daily
8. Listen to Miley Cyrus, daily—and are proud of it. Once we heard it play on the mainstream radio, we labeled it "legit" to listen to.
7. Randomly pass the thizz at people mid conversation (mostly Stina)
6. Flash Peace signs—Japanese style. Example: our picture with Mulan at Disneyland.
5. We go to dances as a couple, doubling with Bri and Adam of course.
4. When we think no one is in the room, Morgan seductively/creepily says, "We are finally alone" only to have someone else walk in the room at that exact moment. Talk about awkward!
3. Have expensive Sushi fixes—weekly
2. Worship Dr. Pepper like Hindu's worship Vishnu.
1. People think we’re lesbians.